Bush in Vegas

George W. Bush went to Vegas on a presidential
agenda.He took a break and walked over to a vending machine.He put a
quarter in it and out popped a soda. He was so facinated and excited,
he kept putting in quarters and getting more sodas. His assistant
tapped him on the shoulder and said, "Mr.President,it is time to go."
Bush looked up in extreme shock and said,"Can't you see I'm winning?"

$10,000 To Kiss Those Breasts

One day this fellow noticed that a new couple had moved into the house
next door. He was also quick to notice that the woman liked to sunbathe
in the backyard, usually in a skimpy bikini that showed off a
magnificent pair of breasts. He made it a point to water and trim his
lawn as much as possible, hoping for yet another look. Finally, he
could stand it no more. Walking to the front door of the new neighbor's
house, he knocked and waited. The husband, a large, burly man, opened
the door. "Excuse me," our man stammered, "but I couldn't help noticing
how beautiful your wife is." "Yeah? So?" his hulking neighbor replied.
"Well, in particular, I am really struck by how beautiful her breasts
are. I would gladly pay you ten thousand dollars if I could kiss those
breasts." The burly gorilla was about to deck our poor guy when his
wife appeared and stopped him. She pulled him inside and they discussed
the offer for a few moments. Finally, they returned and asked our
friend to step inside. "OK," the husband said gruffly, "for ten
thousand dollars you can kiss my wife's tits." At this, the wife
unbuttoned her blouse, and the twin objects of desire hung free at
last. Our man took one in each hand, and proceeded to rub his face
against them in total ecstasy. This went on for several minutes, until
the husband got annoyed. "Well, come on already, kiss 'em!" he growled.
"I can't," replied our awe-struck hero, still nuzzling away. "Why not?"
demanded the husband, getting really angry now. "I don't have ten
thousand dollars."

Three Stupid Blondes

There were three blondes who wanted to cross a river.

So the first blonde asked God if he would make her smart enough to know how to swim and cross the river. So God did.

The second blonde asked God to make her smart enough to build a raft
and croos over the river. So God did. When the third blonde was about
to ask God for her wish, God said, "I'm tired of you blondes and your
dumb wishes." So he made the third blonde smart enough to see the
bridge and cross over it.
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Three bLacK mEn AnD A GeniE

There was once three black men. Two of them wanted to be white but the
third insisted that color is no difference. One day they were walking
on a sandpath and found a lamp. They started rubbing it and a genie
came out. The genie granted one wish for each one of them. The first,
following his dream, wished to be white. With a snap of his finger, the
genie turned him white. The seconed wished for the same and turned
white. The third black man, angry by his friends' wishes, wished both
of them to turn back to their original color.